Hilarious ‘Happy Couple’ Instagram Account Exposes Those Frauds Who Pretend To Have The Perfect Life On Social Media

iStockphoto


You want to know why I drink?

There is this one girl I met like three times through my ex and my ex used to always confide in me how she’d cheat on her boyfriend with any Tom, Dick, or Jerry who would blink in her direction. Of course, the dingleberry boyfriend doesn’t know the wiser and they’re still together. And according to Instagram, they are the happiest couple to ever fucking live. She’s always posting photos in exotic locations with the dude because she’s a trust fund asshat who doesn’t have a job. She’ll caption the photos shit like “I love you because you join me in my weirdness” and “my person.”

Every time I see a photo like this I toggle between unfollowing her and commenting “who took the photo? Did you fuck him too?” Instead I scroll by and a piece of me dies.

This is an extreme case, but the happy couple schtick on Instagram has gotten out of control. Thankfully, a hilarious Instagram account called HonestCouple is doing their part to expose the Instagram frauds and like-fishers. See below:

We have caused so many people to cheat on their spouses and have wrecked so many homes because of the false notion we provided to the world that the fantasy of true love can be found at work, when really humans are just horny animals who will want to fuck anyone they are close to for a long period of time and when they’re at work they’re super depressed and hoping for a better life and that’s why a co-worker who understands their specific depression seems so attractive but really every person is just some idiot and will never be your source of happiness and you should probably just stay with your spouse and make it work

Whenever he’s inside me I can’t help but think, is this really all there is to life?

I was going to dump his ass when we got to New York so things worked out perfectly

We are together because it’s good for both our individual brands. We constantly post about our personal lives in an effort to make our fans feel like a part of our relationship. When we first met, we fell hard for each other. But now it’s evolved into something else, a corporate arrangement we are stuck in. At least when we get divorced we will both be richer than shit.

Truth.

Follow HonestCouple on Instagram. 

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.