Thank God, Louis Vuitton Is Releasing A $1000 Face Shield

I won’t do that weird meme thing. This thing…

Nobody:

Not one person:

Not a soul:

Louis Vuitton: so we’re making face shields.

You know why I’m not going to do that? Because I don’t understand it. I don’t understand how those lines somehow spell out the idea that nobody asked for them to do that. I understand the punchline, but I don’t understand the construction of the joke. So I won’t do it.

What I will do is say that these face shields are cool. Lots of people will knock them. But if masks and face shields are here to stay, why the hell wouldn’t these high-fashion houses develop their own? That Louis Vuitton face shield looks a lot cooler than the crappy, flimsy shields I’ve seen on waiters at restaurants. If you have $1000 lying around, you might as well accessorize your face. After all, the face is where we typically come up with our judgments about people. Might as well have people thinking, wow, responsible AND rich. 

$1,000 does seem like a lot though… especially when you consider that the raw materials for this thing can’t cost more than $3. Labor might be another $3. So you’re talking $6 all-in for Louis Vuitton to put this thing on the shelf. It’s a rough estimate obviously, but we’re talking about a 16666.7% markup. That’s a tidy little profit for doing their part to eradicate COVID in a fashionable way.

Have at it, hypebeasts. Coming October 31st.