Don’t Look At These Photos Of Megan Fox And Machine Gun Kelly At The Billboard Music Awards If You’re Off Birth Control

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June 17, 2020. Nearly one full year ago it was first reported that Machine Gun Kelly and Megan Fox were an item. At the one year mark, most relationships are plagued by monotony, errant flatulence, and the unwelcome realization that at their core, everyone sucks. The Honeymoon Phase is typically at its Ubering To The Airport stage to begin a life of commitment over passion.

These two sex rockets have not gotten the memo, appearing to take a wrong turn en route to the AVN Awards and landing at the Billboard Music Awards instead.

Megan opted to wear the spraypainted plastic ring that holds six packs together, whereas Machine Gun Kelly wore his dad’s wedding tux. Although I’m not sure he’s even aware.

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Dr. Fauci (last week): “I think people are misinterpreting, thinking that this is a removal of a mask mandate for everyone. It’s not.”


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Rich Fury/Getty Images for dcp

For perspective, here is a photo of Megan Fox and ex Brian Austin Green at a comparable award show less than two years prior looking like siblings before Christmas dinner.

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What a difference a couple years and a black tongue makes.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.