Gabrielle Union Would Like You To Know That She Is Satisfied With Dwyane Wade’s D

Gabrielle Union and Dwyane Wade appear to be a happily married couple with a healthy sex life. I know this based on context clues from their oft lit Snapchat stories–namely this one which features D-Wade and Union sweating like Mel Gibson at a bah mitzvah while in bed together. I’m no detective, but I’d venture to guess they just had sexual intercourse. With one another.

And then there was this gesture Gabrielle directed at the camera back in June. Wade has  gesture from Gabrielle back in June. I don’t know much, but I know blowjobs are the key to a long, robust marriage.

Gabrielle recently shot out a tweet praising UCLA star and potential lottery pick Lonzo Ball.

A couple Twitter corndogs thought the compliment was indickative of something bigger. But, as I pointed out above, Gabrielle is set in the Dick Department.

Get it, girl.

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via GIPHY

[h/t Busted Coverage]

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.