Drunk people can be creepy or pleasant, exciting or annoying, pathetic or awesome, but one thing is for sure: they’re often pretty funny. Let’s talk about some of the funniest things that drunk people do.
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7 Think they’re smart
Why do drunk people think they know so much about everything? It’s been scientifically proven that the dumber someone is, the more they think they know and as you may suspect, this goes double for drunkies who try to start laughable debates that they can’t possible win.
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6 Think they’re clever
Most drunk people never quite nail what they were going for. But that’s okay, we’ll toast happily to their failed jokes, low-brow witticisms and generally bizarre attempts at sophisti-humor, because the effort itself is pretty amusing.
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5 Think they’re tough
Simply put, alcohol is poison that makes people stupid (invincible). Sure, it makes it harder to feel the first punch landing on that glass jaw, but damn man, stay down!
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4 Think they’re attractive
Loads of bar sluts think they’re hot just because so many guys want to take them to the bone zone. But I’ll give you a tip, bar sluts: just because guys want to take you home to introduce you to his mattress doesn’t mean you’re hot. Still, it’s always comical seeing a fat chick stuffed into a ridiculously ill-fitting outfit, or a girl who has so much eye shadow on that it looks like she’s been dipped in food coloring.
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3 Get really emotional
Uncontrollable sobbing interrupted by unintelligible words with a constant flow dribbly snot is the hallmark of the emotional lady drunk, while vein-bursting, inferiority-complex-fueled threats and violence are the hallmarks of the emotional dude drunk. Guys and girls, without you we would have no emotional compass.
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2 Get even drunker
Sometimes drunk people can’t tell how drunk they are and it’s only once they’ve passed out on the floor – sprawled out as if they had fallen mid-yoga pose – that they’ve finally stopped drinking. It is at this point that we take a photo and Tweet that bitch out.
Photo credit: Doug Bowman, Flickr
1 Get owned
It’s always impressive when a drunk person who thinks they’re smarter, tougher, more clever or more attractive than they really are, or gets too emotional or too drunk gets owned, no matter whether it is fist or word performing said ownage.
We love ya drunks; keep on diluting life one boozy sip at a time so we can continue enjoying your shenanigans.
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