Surgeon Removes Tumor From Goldfish Because Pets Are More Important Than The Homeless


A surgeon in Australia has successfully removed a *large tumor from a beloved goldfish named George, further proving that people care about their pets more than their fellow human beings.

The Lort Smith veterinary practice in Australia handled the surgery, it took 45 minutes and is reported to have cost ~$200. The goldfish, George, is a common goldfish similar to the ones you’d win at a state or county fair, and which live from 24hrs to 20 years.

Lort Smith has more on the story via their Facebook Page:

The goldfish surgery. How it happened!
Dr Tristan Rich yesterday performed surgery on much-loved goldfish George removing a tumour from his head.
Many of you asked how you actually operate on a fish.
Dr Tristan Rich, head of Lort Smith’s exotic and wildlife vet team, set up three buckets – one with a knock out dose of anaesthetic, one with a maintenance level of anaesthetic, and one with clean water as the recovery unit.
Once George was asleep, Dr Tristan ran a tube from the maintenance bucket which was being oxygenated, into George’s mouth, so that the water with the maintenance dose of anaesthetic washed over his gills.
Dr Tristan worked quickly to remove the large tumour, although the size of it meant that he had to use a gelatine sponge to control the bleeding during surgery. The size of the wound meant it was difficult to seal, so Dr Tristan put in four sutures then sealed the rest of the wound with tissue glue.
Once that had set, George was placed in the recovery unit and given oxygen. He was given injections with long acting pain relief and antibiotics. Soon afterwards he took a couple of breaths on his own and started swimming around.
Working with unusual pets and wildlife means that Dr Tristan has developed a lateral approach to creating effective theatre set ups and we are always amazed at the way he finds a way to help these little critters.

Like most dog (or cat) owners I’ve spent a small fortune on healthcare for my dog. But that’s a dog, not a damn goldfish. I don’t care who you are or how much money you have, it’s still a damned goldfish that you just dropped $200 on. Why not consider kicking a few of those shekles to a soup kitchen and feeding your fellow man for a few days, or weeks? NOPE, goldfish is more important.

This is quite possibly the most privileged First World story I’ve read in 2014, though I’m insanely hungover today after a long bachelor party weekend, and am not really processing thought at normal rates.

If you want more weird content like this you can follow me on TWITTER HERE, and if you come across any tips for posts that you think would make a good fit here on BroBible you can tweet it at me there!


How A Homeless 20-Something In NYC Survives By Picking Up Girls Every Night

Let’s All Watch As This Pod Of Killer Whales Toys With, Devours A Tiger Shark

Watch This Bro Catch A Marlin Using Only Fishing Line And His Bare Hands