Bro Goes On Legendary Twitter Rant About How His Girlfriend Has Made Him A Better Man And Lover

by 2 years ago
happy couple

Shutterstock


Imagine a world without women. How quickly do you think funneling beers, arm wrestling, and helicoptering our dicks around in a field would get old? That’s what we’d do right? Nah? Ok, well I’m down to nix the arm wrestling thing. Whip it out though, bruh. I’m not fucking around.

I think we can all agree that beyond women being the yin to our wangs, they are generally more refined and less animalistic than us bros. They are the reason I haven’t completely given up on my appearance and the driving force behind me throwing away my once beloved JNCO jeans. #RIP.

On top of that, their skin is softer, they smell good, and their butt cracks aren’t a wasteland of tangled hair and hardened dingle berries. For real, I have one stubborn little fucker that’s been hanging on since Clinton was in office. At this point, it’s as much a part of me as a limb and I’ve gone from annoyed to flat out impressed by it being able to withstand thousands of wipes. If I had half the grit the resolve as that dingleberry, I wouldn’t give up on everything I start.

Anyhoo, a bro on Twitter went on a poetic tangent on why his girlfriend has made him a better man, lover, and civilized human being. This belongs in a museum.

I hope this ignites you bros to tell your girls how much they mean to you. Enjoy.

girlfriend tweet 1

IMGUR


girlfriend tweet 2 girlfriend tweet 3 girlfriend tweet 4 girlfriend tweet 5

girlfriend tweet 6 girlfriend tweet 7 girlfriend tweet 8 girlfriend tweet 9 girlfriend tweet 10 girlfriend tweet 11

girlfriend tweet 12 girlfriend tweet 13 girlfriend tweet 14 girlfriend tweet 15 girlfriend tweet 16 girlfriend tweet 17 girlfriend tweet 18

Couldn’t have said it better myself. Because I’m incapable of loving anyone more than myself.

[h/t IMGUR]


Home Alone Cast: Where Are They Now?
TAGSLoveRelationshipstwitter rants

Join The Discussion