A Dude Named Dick Is Trying To Drill A Hole Into The Earth


What else do you expect a man named Dick to do? Not try and create a massive, gaping orifice on the face of Earth, oozing warm, inviting magma that he can stick his metal tool into again and again?


Henry Dick, geophysicist at the Woods Hole Oceanographic Institution, wants to fuck the Earth.

We’ve all got our fetishes. From Nature:

In early December, the drill ship JOIDES Resolution will depart Colombo, Sri Lanka, and head for a spot in the southwestern Indian Ocean known as Atlantis Bank. There, it will lower a drill bit and try to screw [Ed. Note: he he] it through 1.5 kilometres of rock, collecting a core sample as it goes. If all goes well, future expeditions — not yet scheduled or funded — will return and finalize the push into the mantle.

Normally, the crust–mantle boundary is thought to be marked by a feature known as the Mohorovičić discontinuity, or ‘Moho’, at which seismic waves change velocity. But at Atlantis Bank, the mantle is thought to bubble up as far as 2.5 kilometres above the Moho, making it easier to reach.

Dick wants to get that pussy, pussy being magma. He says doing this is “one of the great scientific endeavors of the century,” but let’s be real. Dude just wants to fuck the Earth.

Appears lot of people want to fuck the Earth tho.

A hole that deep “would be the window into things we have never seen before”, says Benoît Ildefonse, a geologist at the University of Montpellier in France.

Who knew geologists were such pervs? Apparently they’ve been trying to fuck the Earth forever.

Scientists first tried to reach the Moho in the middle of the twentieth century. In the 1960s, US scientists led ‘Project Mohole’, which drilled into the sea floor off Guadalupe Island, Mexico. The project reached a depth of just 183 metres before costs ballooned and Congress killed it.

Expeditions have come close before. Between 2002 and 2011, four holes at a site in the eastern Pacific managed to reach fine-grained, brittle rock that geologists believe to be cooled magma sitting just above the Moho. But the drill could not punch through those tenacious layers. And in 2013, drillers at the nearby Hess Deep found themselves similarly limited by tough deep-crustal rocks .

Bet Dick gets hard just thinking about this. And for all his horniness, the expedition could be fruitful.

Along the way, scientists aim to answer profound questions about the planet, such as how molten rock rises from the interior and cools to form fresh ocean crust, a surface that blankets three-fifths of Earth. [They also] hope to explore not just geology, but biology, too. Geological mapping suggests that seawater may have percolated several kilometres deep at Atlantis Bank, triggering chemical reactions that turn the rock into a type known as serpentinite. These reactions generate methane, a gas that sub-sea-floor microbes often munch for energy.

Yea and he gets to be the first to fuck the planet. Go Dick go!

[Via End Times Headline]