Dude Gets A Mystery Package Of Gummy Dicks And I Can’t Decide If It’s The Best Gift Or The Worst


You know that one friend you love to hate on? He takes himself a little too seriously so you give him wet willy’s from the backseat when he’s driving and you tried to finger his sister last summer. The dude who never brings beer to your parties but will pick you up at the bar when you’re too blackout to navigate your way home. Well I do I have the perfect birthday gift for you to give to your frenemy!

A BAG OF GUMMY DICKS

The gummy dick phenomenon started when Imgur user ‘budwick’ uploaded the below photos:

Aww, a package! Could it be that new book you ordered off Amazon? Mittens from Gramma? Your chlamydia prescription?

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Nope. It’s 100 packages within one package. That’s some Russian doll, Inception shit.

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Budwick said that he was “Offended, but delighted. The worst part is, they’re delicious”.

In between eating dicks, he noticed a website at the bottom of the paper: Dicksbymail.com. The cost of the dick package is $15. Pocket change.

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So if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to order some gummy dicks for everyone in my contact list. Even you Grandma. Especially you Grandma. Grandpa’s been gone for years.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.