On Christmas Eve a Japanese fisherman and his crew captured extremely rare footage of the Giant Squid. It’s been less than 15 years since human beings first captured footage (pics or video) of a live giant squid and with the emergence of this latest video I’m now convinced that we should all be bracing our chocolate starfishes for the inevitable giant squid uprising. This video’s going viral at the speed of herpes simplex 1, so make sure to watch it now before you’re the last human being on planet earth that hasn’t seen it:
The footage was captured on Toyama Bay located off of Japan‘s west coast, an area known to be a hot bed for giant squid activity. With the emergence of this up close and personal footage I can only assume that there will be a MASSIVE UPTICK in tentacle porn coming out of the island nation of Japan, so now would be a great time to invest in an animation company and/or tentacle props business (they exist, I promise).
The cephalopod was seen cruising Toyama Bay on Japan’s west coast, an area already known for its stunning firefly squid, which glow an iridescent blue and gather in the area to spawn. This squid, however, was an entirely different beast.
Reports in Japanese say that the creature was filmed on December 24, seen by an underwater camera swimming near boat moorings. It was reportedly about 13 feet long and 3 feet around. Some on Twitter have suggested that the species may be Architeuthis, a deep-ocean dwelling creature that can grow up to 43 feet.
I repeat: INVEST IN THE TENTACLE PORN BUSINESS NOW. (h/t to my fellow editor David Covucci for sending this news my way).