Girl Who Wants To Bone Her Uber Driver Documents Her Experience Trying To Win His Heart

Love can be found in the most hopeless of places, Rihanna claims. The only thing you can do is keep your head on a swivel and take advantage of every opportunity that arises. Whether you’re in line at the grocery store or trying to catch pipe from your Uber driver, never again wonder what could have been.

Kelli tried throwing her hat in the ring to win the heart of her Uber driver on the way home from a party. Let’s see how it went for her.

If you’re observing that your driver’s voice is sexy then you probably need to exert a bit more effort in your love life.

Wearing glasses at midnight. *Sniff sniff* I smell a serial killer. Or Sean Paul.

Translation: He is above 5’2” and has four limbs. *Drops panties*

I remember when I was in eighth grade.

*7th grade.

And then there was hope!

Hey shake it off. Next time, try Lyft.

[h/t LADbible]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.