That Hoppy IPA Beer That You Love Might Be Giving You Man Boobs And Making Your Dong Soft

Hops give beer stability as well as provide that bitter, tangy flavor. This glorious plant has been used in beer since as early as 1079 A.D. in Germany. India pale ales, which have been around for approximately 175 years, utilize more hops to give it a distinct, complex flavor. Thanks to the high levels of phytoestrogen (plant estrogen) in hops, it is said to provide many medicinal benefits including relief for insomnia, menopause, endometriosis, an effective supplement to boost milk production in lactating women, reduced sexual desire among monks and a diuretic that helps you go pee-pee. However those chemicals also may have adverse affects for men.

Stephen Harrod Buhner, an herbalist and author, wrote Sacred and Herbal Healing Beers. In his book he details how hops found in your favorite IPA’s could potentially lead to man boobs and erectile dysfunction. It was often called “Brewer’s Droop” in the past because who men would handle the actual plants with their hands would complain of limp dick and blame the hops. Seems convenient.

The book was released in 1998, but started trending online this week when it was referenced in articles on Vice, Raw Story and Fox News.

A study by the Journal of Clinical Endocrinology & Metabolism has refuted the claims that there are any health dangers to the consumption of hops and don’t mention anything about wet noodle dick or man tits.

This is actually great news. Now I can just blame my gelatinous scallop body on empty calorie beer instead of admitting that the only time I work up a sweat is when I’m out of beer.


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