A Leaked Image Reveals What The iPhone 7 Will Look Like And I Think Apple Is Asleep At The Wheel

The iPhone 7 is set to be released in late September and you know what that means! It means that we’ll vehemently oppose purchasing it until the majority of our friends do and then we’ll remortgage our homes to buy it in a pitiful act to fit in and not appear poor even though our current phones are capable of sending dick pics just as proficiently! Oh goody!

People are expecting big things out of this new device, as it is a brand new model number. What will Apple gift us with this time around? Maybe a phone that turns water into wine? Hopefully a phone that isn’t such a little PC bitch and recognizes that ducking is always meant to be ‘fucking’? I don’t know, just spitballing.

A supposedly leaked photo of the iPhone 7 leaked on Weibo (the Chinese Twitter) and assholes are underwhelmed with the progress.

Hey, I have one of those! Am I cool?!

The photo is nearly identical to last year’s iPhone 6S, with a gold 4.7-inch unit with what appears to be an additional laser auto-focus system (the smallest black dot near the camera lens). Expert Reviews reports that Apple is said to have redesigned the antenna strips, making the rear one continuous sheet of metal; with the existing design, the iPhone has plastic strips breaking up the design. One thing to get excited about is that the new model is said to have slightly bigger batteries, so you can have to juice to send ‘You Up?’ texts deep into the night.

Although it hasn’t been confirmed whether this leak is real or whether its just a digitally enhanced version of the iPhone 6, the leak coming from China gives it more credibility considering that’s where the new phones are being manufactured.

It’s been rumored that Apple doesn’t plan to reinvent the wheel with its new model, but as phone sales have leveled off for the first time in years, this photo of an iPhone 6’s nearly identical twin may not cut it for us technology whores.

[h/t Metro]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.