Back in May, we told you that Taco Bell may start selling alcohol at a new Taco Bell restaurant in Chicago’s Wicker Park neighborhood. Well my friends, that remarkable/disastrous time will arrive any day now.
Though the boozy fast food joint on 1439 N. Milwaukee Ave has yet to open, they have put up their menus which include the fabled and long-awaited alcoholic options. The liquor-serving portion of the restaurant will be called, the “Taco Bell Cantina.” And just just like Chalmun’s Cantina on Mos Eisley, I imagine that “You will never find a more wretched hive of scum and villainy.”
Besides your usual Taco Bell fare, they will also offer red and white wine, sangria and beer (Most likely Dos Equis since there is a sign for the Mexican beer on the outside window) costing $3. They will also serve alcoholic “Twisted Freezes” for $7.19. The Twisted Freezes are frozen mixed alcohol drinks with vodka, rum or tequila. The sweet frozen concoctions will be offered in Mountain Dew Baja Blast, Cantina Punch and Cantina Margarita. Non-alcoholic versions of those same three drinks will cost $2.19 and $2.69 for you kids who like it “virgin.”
First look at the new Taco Bell alcohol menu… pic.twitter.com/OG1wAwDugM
— Mentality Mag (@MentalityMag) September 10, 2015
The Taco Pub will also sell “Happy Hour” special “Shareable” menu items including Chili Cheese Nachos ($3), Mini Quesadilla Nachos ($4) and Chicken Tenders ($5). The shareable plates are only available during the hours of “pre-party” from 5 p.m. to 7 p.m. or “after party” from 7 p.m. to midnight. Tapas Bell.
— 365Chicago (@365Chicago) September 2, 2015
While the Taco Bell has yet to receive their liquor license, there are already plans for the location to end liquor sales by 10 p.m. during the week and midnight on weekends. They also have implemented a strategy of having a security guard or bouncer at the door because getting kicked out of the club with your shitty fake I.D. wasn’t embarrassing enough, now you can be shamed at Taco Bell.
Think of how much gas will be saved from skipping the bar and going directly to Taco Bell.