Wild Brawl Breaks Out At A McDonald’s In London That Features A Chick Spearing A Dude Into The Ground

It doesn’t matter what continent of the planet you’re dealing with, if you’re in McDonald’s past 2 am, keep your iPhone camera ready because you’re about to see some shit. The above brouhaha occurred in Manchester, England this past weekend at 5:10 am. Brooms and mops were used as weapons, women were tackling men to the ground, and dudes were wearing jeans entirely too tight for their legs. It was all around outrageous fun.

Michael, 27, from Offerton, who had been out celebrating a pal’s 30th birthday, told the Manchester Evening News:

“It was disgusting. There was no security on the door so what were the staff supposed to do? There were six or seven brawling in their kitchen. I felt sorry for them. It was a disgrace and they shouldn’t have to put up with it.

“We were queuing up to get our food. It came out of nowhere. They just started firing off and they ended up in the kitchen. It was mental. Although it wasn’t caught on film, at one point one guy picks up a cheese burger and then launches it at someone, saying ‘have a fucking cheeseburger you dick’.

“Have a fucking cheeseburger, you dick.” I’m not sure if that deserves a punch or a hug. Here, eat something delicious you fucking fuck! I’ll take that insult over my dad calling me a mistake on the daily.

P.S. This dude has seen better days.

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.