Bros, I’m a little angry right now and I’ll need you to bear with me for a moment while I bring you up to speed on what’s causing my consternation. I started out this morning to blog an amazing story from Rhode Island of this dad smashing his son’s pumpkin record. The son in this story was the first man in the world to grow a pumpkin weighing over 2,000 pounds, a feat achieved back in 2012.
This year that man’s father took home the top American pumpkin prize when he weighed a 2,261.5-pound pumpkin at the Frerichs Farm Pumpkin Weigh Off, the most prestigious pumpkin growing competition in America. You can see a picture of that glorious pumpkin here.
But when I hopped on Getty Images this morning to find a picture of that pumpkin for my article I stumbled upon a completely different pumpkin, and I found that the pumpkin world record was set last weekend in GERMANY of all places. That pumpkin weighed in at 2,623.5 pounds, making the largest pumpkin ever grown:
From what I’ve gathered, pumpkins aren’t like certain types of vegetables that aren’t tasty when they get enormous. This 2,623.5-pound pumpkin is fully expected to get turned into thousands of pounds of delicious pumpkin pie.
This pumpkin was weighed and certified as the heaviest pumpkin ever grown this past Sunday at the Giant Pumpkin European Championship in Ludwigsburg, Germany. And the record-setting grower, Mathias Willemijns of Belgium, presumably drove that several thousand pound pumpkin on over from Belgium.
What I don’t get is how 4 years ago our Father-Son duo from the beginning of this article can become the first people to ever grow 2,000+ pound pumpkins in the world and just 4 years later a man from Belgium is pumping out a 2,600+ pound pumpkin while we’re still throwing up measly 2,261-pounds pumps. This just doesn’t compute to me. How in the flying fuck did we let these Europeans beat us at our own game and leap ahead in the quest for pumpkin superiority? And what can I as a regular American do to help ensure that next year we demolish this silly Belgian’s record?!? I don’t even know where to turn for these answers, I just want to know that the pumpkin crown is coming home to America next year.