I usually dump people in person because I enjoy seeing the light drain out of their eyes as the realization that the possibility of them being alone for the rest of their lives dawns on them. It’s sort of like ordering dessert after a shitty main course — the main course in this case being the crappy relationship, the dessert being the short period of begging I get to bear witness to. However it’s not often I get to dump people, so knowing that the Tumblr page Last Message Received exists means I get to live vicariously through a bunch of people being assholes to other people. In other words, this is my new spank bank.
And believe me…you could totally spank it to some of these. Not because they’re sexual, but because when you’re an awful person like I am there’s nothing better to get off to than people groveling for you.
Thanks for reminding me what episode I’m watching at the moment, because you know I’m not like…watching it or something.
Simple and to the point.
Poetry was created so that poets could get laid and so losers who think they can write poetry but can’t will eventually Darwin-themselves out of reproducing.
I know at least 5 people like this and I avoid being in public with them too.
Feel better soon! Or die. Either one.