Your Supermarket May Have Sold You Bull Penis Instead Of Regular Meat

Does anyone actually care what’s in the meat they buy? As long as it tastes like ground beef I couldn’t care less if they threw in some tongue or whatever along with everything else. Not everyone’s like me though. People in Texas have unknowingly been chuggin’ down giant cow dicks, and they’re pissed.

“The MT Supermarket in North Lamar was hit with a $5,000 civil lawsuit from the Texas Attorney General Greg Abbott for allegedly selling “non-inspected, adulterated and misbranded beef pizzle as human food,” KXAN TV reports.”

For those of us (i.e. all of us) who don’t know what pizzle is, it’s the technical science-people term for cow dicks. I have to assume the word existed before the coming of our Lord and Savior Snoop Dogg, because otherwise no self-respecting scientist would let that one fly.

Now, no regular Joe Blow would happily pick up a pack of dicks while strollin’ down the grocery aisles. So of course the store repackaged everything.

“The suit alleges that a manager and some employees took pizzle from boxes labeled”inedible beef, not intended for human food” and repackaged it for consumer consumption. They allegedly added wording to the re-labeled product stating the meat was inspected and from a registered source…”

If I were trying to get my scheist on and sell cockmeat there’s a good chance I wouldn’t even bother to change the wording on the label. Who reads meat labels? It’s MEAT. It’s not like my package of chicken is going to say “Contains trace amounts of pubic hair” in small print anywhere, so why bother to look? Kudos to these people for going above and beyond, but at the same time…you still got caught. So maybe no kudos after all.

[H/T Huffington Post]