HOOKER FIGHT! TURF WAR! HOOKER FIGHT! TURF WAR! HOOKER FIGHT! TURF WAR!

It’s the holiday season and money is tight for everyone. Hookers included. Strategic turf placement is as essential for hookers as a push up bra and no father. Prime real estate could be the difference between a fat stack of cash and a Wendy’s double stack.

Gotta appreciate the hustle here:

“I’m not going to no motherfucking alley. For what? For what? I’m not scared of you. I’m out here to get some dough. I’m out here to get some dough. That’s my motto.”

‘I’m out here to get some dough’ is going to be my next tattoo. Lower back. Bullseye.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.