The public’s fascination with celebrities comes and goes in waves: last year everyone was obsessed with Chris Pratt and Jennifer Lawrence, whereas today people are jerking themselves off to photos of Justin Bieber and Gigi Hadid. Taylor Swift rode the hype train for a solid six months back in 2014 when her album came out, but since then she’s been laying pretty low…until Calvin Harris reportedly dumped her, that is.
While Calvin has come out to say that their breakup was at least somewhat amicable, people have been quick to assume that Swift’s next album will be a collection of songs dissing the famous DJ and their relationship. This is her MO, and possibly the only way she pulls inspiration for songs.
Regardless of how Taylor feels about it (and we’ll get to find out her opinion in oh, say, maybe a year from now? How long does it take to cut an album?), the Internet certainly had their opinions as Twitter managed to get the hashtag #IDumpedTaylorSwiftBecause trending, and boy did people roast the hell out of her:
#IDumpedTaylorSwiftBecause She didn't respect my privacy! pic.twitter.com/UwIMST3MUP
— Lou Brutus (@LouBrutus) June 3, 2016
#IDumpedTaylorSwiftBecause I fell in love with Trailor Swift instead… pic.twitter.com/0msatMSEDe
— CookieMan (@pcook102) June 3, 2016
https://twitter.com/DanielC3000/status/738726303617146880
https://twitter.com/TarHeelTory/status/738723112909316096
#IDumpedTaylorSwiftBecause I just wasn't feeling 22
— Feral Urkel (@twitsnotnice) June 3, 2016
https://twitter.com/mch2601/status/738707907563249674
#IDumpedTaylorSwiftBecause I thought "Shake it Off" was Very Offensive to people with Parkinson's
— T_R_E_E_ (@treedoesstandup) June 3, 2016
#IDumpedTaylorSwiftBecause I'm so vain, I'd probably think her next song would be about me…
— Save As, Gah.xlsx (@GahBr0wnTZ) June 3, 2016
#IDumpedTaylorSwiftBecause I wanted to hear what song she'd write about me
— itsbaeily (@its_baeily) June 3, 2016
https://twitter.com/Jm3cooper/status/738681634870943744
https://twitter.com/rea1Dona1d7rump/status/738679245795266560
#IDumpedTaylorSwiftBecause her dick was bigger than mine
— Medsworth (@MustBeTheMeds) June 3, 2016
#IDumpedTaylorSwiftBecause of all the heartache songs, dwelling in the past, that kind of talk during sex kills my erection.
— JoeyLaijas (@JoeyLaijas) June 3, 2016
Not everyone was up for the joke though, as some people just HAD to go and get offended because GOD FORBID we lampoon a girl for her thousandth failed relationship:
There's Already a Disgustingly Sexist Hashtag Celebrating Taylor Swift Twitter hashtag #IDumpedTaylorSwiftBecause is trending.
— ⚡️CommonWhiteGirl⚡️ (@_teen_problem) June 3, 2016
https://twitter.com/saidswiftnow/status/738752435179507713
do you all not have life because this is absolutely so low on so many levels
— meg (@urbansdiary) June 3, 2016
https://twitter.com/prismspiritual/status/738740206245810178
https://twitter.com/kayelynrob/status/738742915946647556
What’s next, we can’t make fun of a kid falling into a gorilla pit?
Oh wait…
[H/T Uproxx]