Watch This Woman Almost Get Her Arm Taken Off While Feeding A Gigantic Fish

Just drop the goddamn food in the water, lady. The fish are probably pissed you’re making them fucking Free Willy leap for a nibble. Just think about if we lived in a world where fish were the superior species and feeding us. Would you want to jump out of your comfortable habitat and into a pool just for a bite of an apple? Hell no. Leave that shit on land where I can enjoy it at my leisure. I’m not your puppet, I’m hungry, so quit being a dick and just do as I say. Or I’ll bite the fuck out of your fin.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.