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It’s 2015 and queefing isn’t just for women anymore. Powerful men can also be victims of that gas that sneaks out on a moment’s notice. We’ve found aix instances where NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell looked like he was on the verge of letting out a queef.
We’ve invited body language expert Ron Fitzpatrick to discuss.
6.
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“This is a classic queef motion. Goodell goes to make a point with his right hand and he inadvertently starts letting gas out of his vagina. By spreading his fingers he is saying ‘Hey world, I just queefed. Deal with it.’ Very strong leader.”
5.
“The realization factor is big here. When you’re queefing you only feel it a split second before it happens and it’s almost impossible to stop. The panic on Roger’s face here says it all. He knows that gas is as good as gone.”
4.
“This is an interesting one because most queefs come during or after a sexual act. Roger’s body thinks he is engaged in a sexual act because of his increased heartbeat and chin to chin contact. His smile quickly turns to a slight frown as he notices a queef is on the way.”
3.
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“The hand to the chin tells me he is panicked. While queefs do make a sound, they are odorless, and I know a smart guy like Roger knows that. Still, when you’re trying at the very last possible instant to hold in a queef, you’re not thinking clearly.”
2.
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“His face makes me think he has already let out several queefs. This is somebody who understands what’s happening, he doesn’t like it but he’s embracing it. I call this the George W. Bush Queef Face.”
1.
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“This is a defeated man. They say father-time is undefeated, well so is father-queef. Nobody has ever successfully held in a queef. Roger knows this. He knows he’s in for a life of queefing in public and the sooner he accepts this, the better off things will be.”