Ed Orgeron Earned A Thick Bonus Check For Winning The National Championship, Celebrates With Ham Sandwich

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Hypothetical Reporter: Ed, you just led LSU to its first National title in over a decade. You are the most charismatic and ingratiating coach in the country and your future is so bright it’s blinding. What are you going to do to celebrate this seminal moment in your life?

Coach O [in the manliest voice the world has ever known]: A ham fucking sandwich with the family sounds about right.

On Monday night, Coach O experienced the pinnacle of his 30+ years in coach, etched himself in college football history, and was awarded a $500,000 bonus for the title win. Add this to the $1.275 million he already secured in incentives based on team performance and coach of the year awards.

Mr. Orgeron is richer than he’s ever been, and acting like he just hit for $10 on a gas station scratch ticket.

Find yourself a man who speaks about you the way Coach O speaks of his family:

“We’re just simple folks. We love our life, I love my family. My personal time with them — we don’t go out, and we don’t do things like that. We represent the state of Louisiana so we’re excited.”

What a majestic human.


For pay perspective, three of LSU’s assistants — Dave Aranda, Steve Ensminger and Tommie Robinson — each received an extra $25,000 for an incentive total of $125,000, and the other coaches (ie head strength coach), earned an extra $15,000 for a total of $75,000 per.

If Clemson won Monday night, Dabo Sweeney would have earned himself an extra $250,000 to pair nicely with his $600,000 in incentives and FBS-high $9.3 million salary this season.


[h/t For The Win]



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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.