Newly Single Boston Chick Prowling For A Rebound Posts Craigslist Ad Offering Free Patriots Ticket Intended For Ex

Fellow Boston bros–before we let our penises ahead of us, let’s tuck it between our legs for a second and look at this rationally.

*Googles ‘how to look at things rationally’*

This is a classic case of all that glimmers isn’t gold. Would we all salivate at the opportunity to see Tom Brady in spandex before reminding ourselves that we’re straight and having almost certain rebound sex with a chick obviously looking to make you her mistake? Of course. But it would be just a tidal wave of emotions to ask her trivial questions about her hobbies while having a panic attack about a 2nd and 3 in the first quarter. It’s just too big of a game to hear about her marketing job. It’s likely that your opinion of her will directly correlate to the success of the Patriots and it’s wayyyyy too early in the relationship to bring another guys into it. what. nothing.

For those of you who learn better through word association: Date night, football, = church, state.

Watching the game with your boys in the comfort of your own home is the move anyway because if God forbid the game takes a turn for the worse, you can take solace in calling each other pussies.

P.S. I would say that since she didn’t include a picture, it’s probably for a good reason, but you’ll be way too drunk and sloppy for your conscience to make an appearance.

P.P.S. Who the fuck am I kidding, if this chicks invites me to the game, I’d 100% go. Oh, you have no face tattoos? I’m in. Little Adam’s Apple never hurt no one anyway.

Bros in the Boston area, here’s the Craigslist ad. Let the games begin, pussies.


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