NFL Fans React To Tom Brady’s Illogical New Subway Commercial, Are Mostly Just Creeped Out

• There is a lot of weirdness going on with Tom Brady’s new Subway commercial, including the fact that he would literally never eat Subway.
• Football fans who saw the new commercial were left very perplexed by this collaboration that on the surface makes very little sense.
• More Tom Brady news here.

Subway is a fast food restaurant that had to create an entire website to share the “truth” about whether its tuna is real.

Tom Brady is so meticulous about what he puts into his body that he published a self-help book about it, drinks a potentially deadly amount of water, and NEVER COMBINES FRUITS with other food.

Sounds like a match made in Heaven, right?

Well, it must be, because Thursday night it was revealed during the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and Dallas Cowboys game that, yep, Brady is now a spokesperson for Subway.

This, despite the fact that, as the Boston Globe reported after Brady’s book came out…

In addition to his strict regime of mostly plant-based foods, Brady follows a so-called alkaline diet, which purports to minimize muscle inflammation. Long story short, he generally tries to limit “acidifying” foods — such as white rice and bread, but also cold cuts, pineapples, and yogurt, to name a few — to 20 percent of his diet. The other 80 percent he says should be made up of alkalizing foods, like Brussels sprouts, sweet potatoes, and dandelion greens.

“Seductive, irresistible, yet forbidden,” says the disembodied female voice in the new commercial. “Bready…”

That’s when Tom Brady jumps in.

“The new fragrance that says Subway has so much new it didn’t fit in their last ad,” says Brady. “So they bought time in mine to talk about hearty multi-grain bread.”

“Freshly baked…” the disembodied female voice whispers.

“Smells so good I can almost taste it,” says Brady.

“But you don’t eat bread,” replies the sultry disembodied female voice.

La fin.

If you watched and listened to Brady’s Subway commercial and were left looking like this…

You are not alone.

First off, Subway, wisely, turned off the comments on the YouTube version of Brady’s commercial. Too bad. Those would have been fun.

Thank goodness for Twitter.

While the money angle is a good explanation for this inexplicable collaboration between Subway and Tom Brady there really is only one reason why TB12 would ever deign to be associated with food he literally would never eat.