Nothing like a couple of juiceheads to spoil your party. Everyone’s having a good time, drinking a few beers, getting turned down by a couple of sorority hotties, not doing steroids when BOOM a couple dudes are taking their shirts off in preparation to either 1) Touch nips or 2) Get into a violent display of masculine dominance that will probably ruin the party. No matter if no one likes the two said dudes. Even if they are both kicked out, the party’s going to be ruined because they knocked a bunch of shit over and probably elbowed a girl in the face. And it was probably the girl you were talking to, because that’s your luck.
This scenario is pretty much exactly what happened at Washington State University on Saturday when a football player seemingly attacked two random partygoers unprovoked, knocking one completely unconscious and breaking the other’s jaw.
Via Seattle Times:
“A group of Washington State University football players is being blamed for a brutal assault that left one student unconscious and another with a fractured jaw.
Alex Rodriguez, a 21-year-old senior, underwent surgery at Pullman Regional Hospital following the assault at a party early Saturday morning. Another student received a bloody wound on the back of his head when he was thrown onto a slab of concrete. The student, who did not want his name published, said the group had been causing trouble — prying off pieces of a wooden railing, lighting fireworks among the crowd — and retaliated when he told them to leave.
“All I remember is telling them to leave multiple times,” the student said. “I came to on the ground with police and EMTs over me.”
Witnesses said several men knocked Rodriguez to the ground and repeatedly kicked him in the face, breaking his jaw in several places. Dylan Rollins, a sophomore, attempted to pull him away.
“He was beat up bad,” Rollins said. “There’s blood all over the ground.”
Witnesses provided a list of several football players whom they believe carried out the assaults. The backyard party drew a large crowd; the assaults were captured on video and shared on Snapchat.”
Thank Christ for Snapchat.
I’ve never had my jaw broken, but I have been knocked out before. Granted, it was on the rugby pitch and I was pretty hungover so I led with my head instead of my shoulder, but it’s nonetheless a horrible experience. Especially when the guys were just trying to make sure that a couple of juiceheads didn’t pull the walls apart. You invite people over to your house and expect your guests to not tear your walls apart. I think that’s a pretty reasonable request. Call me crazy. This is why you don’t invite juiceheads anywhere. They can’t help themselves. First they’re flexing their muscles in shirts that are too tight for them, then they’re tearing apart your home and getting violently mad when you tell them to stop.