I think we can all agree that taking the early flight home from San Diego and witnessing a couple of nude people jump out of your bathroom blindfolded like a goddamn magic show ready to double team your girlfriend is considered ‘cheating.’ But, in this day and age, cheating can take different forms, and couples are often left divided between what constitutes infidelity.
As much of our lives is spent with our heads down laser focused on our phone, online cheating is an increasingly prevalent grey area that experts find is a slippery slope for committed couples. A study commissioned by the Deseret News and conducted by YouGov set out to profile this trend by polling 1,832 Americans about a range of scenarios they consider to be cheating on a partner.
Per Deseret News,
Roughly three quarters of Americans agree that having sex or kissing someone other than your partner is always cheating, but they bring less clarity to questions about online and other non-physical activities.
For example, 51 percent say sending flirtatious messages is always cheating, 19 percent say the same about watching pornography without a partner and 16 percent say following an ex on social media is always cheating. But in each of these cases, at least 25 percent of respondents say these activities “sometimes” constitute cheating.
Nearly half of U.S. adults (45 percent) say following an ex on social media is sometimes cheating, compared to 16 percent who say that it’s always adultery. Around 1 in 3 Americans believe watching pornography without your partner (28 percent) or sending flirtatious messages to someone who isn’t your partner (31 percent) is sometimes a problem.
New technologies blur the line of the traditional definition of infidelity, which can be a death sentence to couples who don’t establish guidelines. The divide is alarming when you consider how differently each sex views infidelity.
The survey also found a deep gender divide on what constitutes adultery, with women more likely than men to define 11 behaviors on the survey as cheating. The gap was especially large on activities enabled by the internet, such as maintaining an online dating profile, which 70 percent of women but only 55 percent of men say is always cheating.
Nearly 6 in 10 women (59 percent) believe that sending flirtatious messages to someone other than your partner is always cheating, compared to 42 percent of men, a 17 percentage point gap.
Sixty-one percent of women said that being emotionally involved with someone other than your partner is always cheating, compared to 48 percent of men, a 13 percentage point gap.
Michi Fu, a California-based psychologist, claims that the reason why internet cheating is so rampant can be explained with the idea of the ‘Triple-A Engine’–meaning it’s accessible, affordable, and anonymous.
Moral of the story: make sure you cross your t’s and dot your i’s when understanding the boundaries of your relationship.
[h/t Deseret News]