Valentine’s Day Is Canceled! Sweethearts Candy Conversation Hearts Won’t Be Available For The First Time In 153 Years

by 2 years ago


My favorite Valentine’s Day tradition is handing my crush a heart candy with a message on it that says “Crushin’ on U” or “Be Mine” or a message that makes up for my crippling fear of talking to the opposite sex.

It looks like this year I will be forced to stalk my crush on all social media platforms without the luxury of borderline date-rapey messages at my disposal.

Sweethearts, the conversation heart candy and Valentine’s Day’s most popular candy, won’t be available this Valentine’s Day season after they candy’s original producer went out of business last year. This marks the first time these little fuckers won’t be available in a century and a half.

New England Confectionary Company (Necco) went out of business in July. According to CNBC:

Round Hill Investments bought Necco in an auction but sold its Necco wafer brand and Sweethearts to Spangler Candy Company several months later. Spangler’s best-known candy is its Dum Dum lollipops.

The candy company acquired the brands in September and did not have the time to produce the conversation hearts for this Valentine’s Day.

Around 8 billion Sweethearts are produced annually with the full supply sold in the six weeks before Valentine’s Day, according to 19 million pounds are sold each year and there’s no statistic that shows how many men actually get laid from them. I’m guessing 3-5.

In response to a request for comment from CNBC, Spangler sent the following message:


Looks like I’ll have to carve ‘Bang Me’ into a Russell Stover chocolate heart.



Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.

TAGSCandysweetheartsValentine's Day