These Hilarious HIV-Prevention Condoms Are The Best Thing To Come Out Of Utah In Years But Their No-Fun Governor Canceled Them
Utah is one of the least progressive places in America. I visited Zion National Park in Utah back in November for work and they only just passed a law allowing regular strength beer to be sold (5% ABV) which was actually pretty incredible because I’d expected to be drinking bottled water after every hike but they’ve already got some bonafide excellent craft beers available there. But I digress.
The state of Utah is quite socially conservative. 73% of the state are Christians and 55% of those Christians are Mormon, the highest percentage of any state in the country. So when I saw this safe sex/condom campaign coming out of Utah I didn’t think there was any shot in hell that it could be real.
I didn’t think these brilliant dong covers that were designed as part of a campaign to combat the spread of HIV could actually be a real state-sponsored initiative because they are too good. I’d be shocked to see these in any state let alone Utah. The innuendo is fan-fucking-tastic. And if these slogans don’t make their way to t-shirts that are sold forever it will be a crying shame. Truly.
Check these out and tell me these condom slogans printed on bumper stickers and t-shirts wouldn’t make the best ‘Visit Utah’ tourism campaign in the history of America. We could put these designs on t-shirts here at BroBible and I’d be able to retire by the end of 2020 they’d be so successful. They’re that good.
I understand that the Salt Lake, Utah (SL,UT) one might be confusing and offensive to some people who don’t immediately realize it’s referring to the Great Salt Lake but there’s no sense in getting riled up over the others. Governor Herbert of Utah has ripped them from shelves and asked their partners to stop distributing them.
According to FOX 13 Now, the state was planning on distributing 100,000 of these glorious jock socks until Governor Gary Herbert ruined the fun.
“The Governor understands the importance of the Utah Department of Health conducting a campaign to educate Utahns about HIV prevention,” his spokeswoman, Anna Lehnardt, told FOX 13 in a statement. “He does not, however, approve the use of sexual innuendo as part of a taxpayer-funded campaign, and our office has asked the department to rework the campaign’s branding.”
The condoms had wrappers that touted the “Greatest Sex on Earth” (a parody of Utah’s “Greatest Snow on Earth”); “This is the Place” (which was uttered by Brigham Young when pioneers entered the Salt Lake Valley); the subversive “SL, UT” for Salt Lake, Utah; “Toss the Jello Salad;” and, of course, the local landmarks “Fillmore, Beaver.”
Disappointed but not surprised. I think everyone in the nation would’ve been shocked to learn a few months from now that these condoms had been widespread across Utah. It’s just not the type of state that’s ready to welcome public jokes about sex and that’s a shame because these designs deserve to be placed in a museum.
The Utah state government has launched a new website, HIVandMe.com, as part of this campaign. That website will remain along with “H is for Human” billboards. So they didn’t ripcord the entire campaign, just the fun parts.