Here Are 15 Jaden Smith Tweets That You Should Definitely Use As Pick-Up Lines

Sometimes when I’m feeling down or uninspired, I scroll through Jaden Smith’s tweets to instill in myself some wisdom from a 19-year-old who was born with a silver spoon. The self-proclaimed poet slash philosopher has instilled in me more wisdom than Socrates and Dr. Phil ever could. I wish I could thank him, but I know I am not worthy.

I hope you find the same enlightenment I do in Jaden’s infinite wisdom. Try using one of these pickup lines at a bar but make sure to remind the ladies that it’s illegal to drop their panties in public.

Prove it. Gauge them out. Don’t be a baby back bitch.

Besides shitting their pants and sucking their own mother’s boobies, newborns are basically Rain Main.

Bro I think the mushrooms are kicking in.

Jaden you will never die. You will live through your father’s legacy for all eternity.

When the Uber driver doesn’t offer you a Werther’s Original…

Don’t confuse feel good crying with syphilis. Shit is like peeing out razor blades. Says a friend of mine that isn’t me.

Is math another name for jerking off? Then ya, totally agree.



Oh I get it. Wait, actually. What the fuck are you talking about?

New cells. Same piece of shit.

noun: the natural agent that stimulates sight and makes things visible.

Dude I just asked if you knew the time.

Lifehack: if you say ‘Nevermore’ in a sentence, you’re automatically smarter than everyone in the room.

Shrek was also an obese ogre whose best friend was a donkey.

DONE!

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.