Feast Your Eyes On The Biggest Nerf Gun Ever Assembled, Capable Of Shooting Darts At 40 MPH

I just turned 29 years old. I should be interested in fine wine, leather-bound books, and diversified stock portfolios but instead I get hard ons from Fun Dip and Nerf Guns. Like I would legit suck your dick for a Power Wheels. Take it out bro, knowing you, it should only take a minute.

Anyhoo, we’ll revisit that when we’re alone.

What we need to discuss right now is a man child’s wildest fantasy: the largest Nerf gun ever assembled. Sure, we’ve all seen the Nerf Battle Racer that I asked for for Christmas (Don’t fuck this up Santa, you stingy fuck), but this right here, this is some next level shit.

This masterpiece has a 3000 psi paintball tank, with the chamber regulated at 80 psi per shot so you can generate 20 shots out of a single tank and you don’t accidentally kill your grandmother with one plunger pool noodle missile. Keep sending me 5 dollar savings bonds grandma and you may get what’s coming to you.

Anyone have a birthday party coming up? I’m looking for an excuse to let off some steam. *Goodie bags a necessity.

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P.S. Put your dick away dude, I was just fucking around about the Power Wheels offer. Sick fuck.

There is no end to the possibilities of a Nerf Gun. And if you’re a Nerf Gun lover, check out the 6 Best Nerf Guns To Buy For Under $50 Perfect For Outdoor Wars

[h/t Gizmodo]

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