American Flags Should Be Flown At Half-Staff Today Because CANADA Just Beat Us To Inventing Weed-Infused Nutella

https://www.instagram.com/p/BCVtiBBsB4d/?taken-by=chrontella

Canada just dropped the hammer. I’ve never felt less proud to be an American. My raging Patriot boner just softened faster than a Choco Taco in a heat wave. Sure, we landed on the moon, invented things like the internet, the Model T Ford, the cell phone, and Freedom (just to name a few), but how many of those things get you high while providing a creamy orgasm in your mouth? I count zero.

Canada just up and invented Chrontella–a buttery mix chocolate and hazelnut spread with 300mg of cannabis extract swirled throughout, according to Unilad. The $23 jar contains 300 milligrams of product, and it is reported that only 10 to 30 milligrams get you higher than Chris Christie’s blood pressure.

https://www.instagram.com/p/BDMIrFysB7k/?taken-by=chrontella

https://www.instagram.com/p/BBLWxqTjdM_/?taken-by=cronic_cannabis_canada

Sometimes, you just have to swallow your patriot pride and tip a cap to the competitor. Well done, Canada.

[h/t Unilad]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.