Researchers Now Believe It Was One Single Asshole Who Brought All Of Us The Zika Virus



Hey, are you the asshole who brought the Western hemisphere the Zika virus? If it was you, be careful, because authorities are on the lookout for your bitch ass.

Researchers are trying to find out how the Zika virus got over here, and they think they’ve narrowed it down to one person. Because you know, a mosquito can’t fly across the Pacific Ocean. I don’t think. I hope not.

From NY Mag’s Intelligencer blog:

The virus seems to have made its Western Hemisphere debut in the blood of a single traveler who went from French Polynesia or Southeast Asia to Brazil between May and December of 2013, according to a study published in Science on Thursday.

They speculate that the virus possibly arrived here during the 2013 Confederations Cup in Brazil, the run up to the World Cup.

This study focused on the Zika genome, instead of travel patterns, as a way to try and pinpoint just where it came from.

Researchers were able to locate similarities among 23 viral genomes from Thailand, French Polynesia, Haiti, Colombia, Martinique, Guatemala, Suriname, Puerto Rico, Brazil, and the Americas. Then, by creating a “molecular clock” that tracks the speed of mutations in blood samples from the past three years, they could work their way back to establish a date for its arrival.

Which puts it right in that time period.

So I ask again, was it you?

Meanwhile, here’s what you need to know about the Zika virus. The answer is nothing. It doesn’t really harm dudes all that much.

Being a Bro is great.

[Via NY Mag]