Chad Johnson Pays Rent Of A Random Stranger Facing Eviction After Her Desperate Twitter Plea

by 8 months ago

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Very rarely do we get the opportunity to relay news of a Chad doing good in the world, so this gives me great joy thank you for reading.

Chad Johnson is a rare breed of Chad who doesn’t wear pastels and spend his father’s money. Chad Johnson is a virtuous man with a proclivity to overtip and resurrect people out of dire situations.

When a random stranger says, “I owe this man my life” and means it, that’s the stuff legends are made of.

Johnson dug into his virtual wallet yet again for a woman facing eviction. This doesn’t apply to the story but may be the most essential part of it: her Twitter handle is @bigpussysally. Chad, like us, knows nothing about this woman other than she’s probably not a school teacher.

How come when Chad Johnson pays for big p*ussy, he gets praised but when I do it I get three months in the slammer? The life of the rich and famous, I guess.

Mr. Johnson has a net worth of $18 million says a site that’s probably just guessing, but he’s spreading the wealth by helping out one person each month. If he gets more, we get more. And by we, I mean the poor people: me and big p*ussy Sally.

P.S. The only thing I remember as an Economics major is, “there’s no such thing as a free lunch.”

GAHTTT EEEEEEEM.

Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.

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