I don’t really watch a lot of golf, but I am a big fan of golfer Andrew ‘Beef’ Johnson, mostly because of the fact that he followed up on his promise of getting hammered with the boys after winning the Spanish Open a few months ago.
Thank God for Beef. International treasure. We need more people like him, not afraid to be themselves and drink too many pints out of an international trophy. So now, of course, PETA is trying to claim him for their own by telling him to rename himself ‘Tofu’.
“The United Kingdom branch of the animal right organization wrote an open letter to the English golfer yesterday, asking him to become a vegan and change his nickname from “Beef” to “Tofu.”
According to the release:
‘Consider adopting a kinder, healthier vegan lifestyle, which would pave the way for a new nickname: Andrew “Tofu” Johnston.’
‘Your new nickname would also raise awareness of the urgent need to move towards a cruelty-free lifestyle to offset the worst effects of climate change. According to the United Nations, animal agriculture is “one of the top two or three most significant contributors to the most serious environmental problems, at every scale from local to global”.’
An interesting idea, though hopefully they’re not too optimistic.”
Thank God for Beef. Honestly, PETA needs to relax. It’s 2016. No one gives a shit whether you’re a vegetarian or vegan or whatever. We have much bigger things to worry about. At the same time, PETA can’t turn around and try to meat shame me. I get yelled at enough in my life. I don’t need to have it done to me while my third hotdog is halfway down my throat. I don’t need that in my life. Let me keep my beef and I promise I’ll continue to not run dog-fighting rings in my backyard.