College Dude Trying To Finish His Final Paper At The Last Minute Won’t Let Responsibility Get In The Way Of Boozing

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When we’re in college, we believe that the outcome of one particular exam or overall class grade will be the deciding factor between getting a dream job and masturbating in our parents’ basement for a decade. It’s only after we graduate that we realize that we’re $60,000 in debt and the difference between a 1.9 GPA and a 3.9 GPA matters about as much to potential employers as the size of your father’s penis. I don’t know why I decided to go with that analogy, but I’m fairly confident that the dad’s penis question has never been asked in a job interview, so the metaphor is rock solid. Like your dad’s dick.

Ok. Enough.

Anyway, this 21-year-old “lad” named Lawrence Kemp was recently on a quest to successfully finish his second year at the University of Gloucestershire (England), where he studies business management. The only thing that stood in his way was a 2,000 word essay, which he would not let stand in the way of getting absolutely bent with friends.

His buddies captured Kemp’s quest to finish his essay, while succumbing to the peer pressure of his rowdy friends.

Lawrence, who got 81 percent for the year, said:

“To be perfectly honest, I had started a few days prior, but I left my last 750 words and editing to last minute. I fully intended on going out as I hadn’t been out in a while, but the assignment took longer than I thought.

“So, I was reluctant to join my mates until I finished, but I knew I was capable of editing work and enjoying the night.”

The wisest tidbit of knowledge I can give to you collegians: The best thing about waiting until the last minute is that it only takes a minute.

[h/t LADbible]

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.