These Custom MTN DEW Bottles For Each of the DEWnited States Are Essential This Summer

by 1 year ago

BroBible


Presented in partnership with Mountain Dew

Do you feel that swelling in your chest, ladies and gentlemen? In the medical community, we call that the “Pre-Fourth Of July Jitters,” with the elevated heart rate merely a symptom of the immense excitement that accompanies celebrating the birthday of this great nation with all the people who make it that way.

Fireworks on the Fourth, while majestic and an ideal way to nuzzle up to your crush, are really a microcosm of America. Each style–sparklers, roman candles, horsetail shells–representing a unique state in the union and can only be truly appreciated when working in unison. Image a firework show featuring just one type, one color. It would be like my 9th birthday party, no one would show up!

The fine folks and patriotic folks at Mountain Dew recognize that America is only as strong as the sum of its parts, and in the run-up to 4th of July, did God’s work by releasing fifty specially designed bottles representing the individuality of each of the 50 states in these DEWnited States. Even North Dakota!

Here is me repping my home state. Is my Boston showing by any chance?

 

Drop your r’s and pick up a notebook and number two pencil because we’re heading to summer school.

We kicked it over to the Garden State so our friend BrilliantlyDumb can tell us what goes on there outside of gym, tan, laundry.

They say everything’s bigger in Texas, and Scotterly’s love for Dew is bigger than a Friday night football game at Dillon High School.

 

Skip Bayless: Oklahoma

 

Donnie Wahlberg: Massachusetts

 

 

Chase Elliott: Georgia

 

Josh Dallas: Kentucky

 

Myles Turner: Indiana

 

Josh Hart: Maryland

Head over to the DEWnited website to learn how collecting all 50 state bottles can win you $100.

Enjoy the 4th bros!

Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.

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