The Demise Of Tinder: Why It Has Become An Awful Waste Of Time
Tinder is dead.
Don’t get me wrong, Tinder was great when it first broke out onto the scene. But it has gradually evolved from its initial purpose of being a hook-up app to a “dating” app to what it is now – a validation-seeking app.
Given that the current generation of young people is socially deficient and isn’t getting laid, I’ve always been intrigued by Tinder. So much so that I’ve considered writing a PhD thesis on Tinder and becoming a sex researcher. You know, so that I can test whether squirting is actually peeing and collect flowback samples from vaginas.
Tinder’s recent move to impose a swipe limit was supposed to be good for all of us – people would exercise their limited swipes carefully and thus your matches are less likely to be flaky, right? Well, not so. Because anyone who has had any sort of success with Tinder knows that it’s all about the Numbers Game. The end result of the swipe limit is that more time-wasters, validation-seekers and fake profiles (including commercial hookers) = less success.
Sure, if you’re looking for a hook-up, there are still girls who are looking for the same thing lurking in the background waiting to be discovered. But the difference between then and now is this – with the tremendous increase in popularity of the app, the influx of girls coming on board comprises a ton of chicks who treat this whole swiping thing as a game.
Yeah, for people to compete with their friends how many matches they can get when they are bored on a lonely night at the bar. For people to boost their egos, seek attention, cock-tease you with no intention of ever meeting up.
Doesn’t matter if you look like Leonardo DiCaprio, or if you exchange endless texts and tell them thousands of jokes – it’s more likely that Leo wins another Oscar before they meet up with you in person. Simply because they are NOT AVAILABLE in the first place.
There you go, it’s now more challenging to sieve through all the noise and get to the needle in the haystack. You have to learn to “screen” harder than ever, to get through the time-wasters. Don’t be mistaken, you can still get laid if you persist. There are only two conditions: to find that chick who is available and DTF, and for you to be good looking enough for her.
What I’ve said varies according to a few factors – which determine the extent to which you might face this problem (so don’t be so quick to send me your hate mail). Some of the factors include:
1. a) Your Location – Is the city you live in filled with open-minded people who embrace a liberal culture, or do you live in a conservative country like me where people remain virgins until the age of 30 and then proceed to have sex 3 times in their whole lives between 30 and 40 years old (the three nights that their three children were conceived).
1. b) Your Standards – How low are you willing to go? Is your ego so huge that you are reluctant to go for anyone less than Megan Fox or Charlotte McKinney? Or are you prepared to lower your threshold because every human being looks the same after a couple of beers? And of course the most important factor at the end of the day is
1. c) Your Looks – Duh. That’s the hard truth.
If you find that Tinder is not working out for you where you live, listen up. If you’ve been rotting in your basement the past 2 years swiping with no results, here is what you need to do. I have 3 solutions for you, to prove that I’m not just spewing drivel due to my lack of evolutionary success.
1) Filter hard. Real hard.
Don’t waste your time engaging in long back-and-forth messages. Ask her out as soon as possible. Here’s my take on this. If she would agree to meet up after 20 messages, she would agree to meet up after 10 messages. If she would agree to meet up after 10 messages, she would agree to meet up after 5 messages. You get the idea. Yes I know, some women may need more time to get comfortable and get a lawyer to certify that you’re not a serial killer before agreeing to hang out.
But remember this – Excitement is more powerful than Comfort. If she already likes you, and you ask her out immediately – that’s exciting. There’s no need overdo the comfort part. Conversely, if she never intended to be down, you can’t change that no matter how many hours you chat. Instead of spending your precious time “building comfort”, it is more time-efficient to filter out the attention-seekers and go for those who are down to hang right away.
2) It’s all about branding.
To be very clear here, I’m speaking to men using the app for its original intended purpose – to hook-up. Since users of the app have now diversified so much, it’s important to “market” yourself correctly. If you’re looking to hook-up, then portray yourself as such – someone who knows what he is doing so she knows she is going to get a good time. If you’re looking to score a girlfriend or a potential wife, then portray yourself as boyfriend material, which may take you a longer time to get a girl out. Law of Attraction 101.
3) Better still, do what your grandfather did when he did not have technology during his time.
It’s time to return to the old days and stop hiding behind a screen. Get out of the house and get back to some good old approaching. Tinder was meant to help us save time by mass “approaching” tons of women. Because it’s a numbers game after all. But as they said, insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. Unless you are Katniss Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence) from Hunger Games, the odds are NOT in your fucking favor.
Think about it, how many messages do women receive a day?
The harsh reality is that there are way too many horny men out there competing for a limited number of women looking for a hook-up. Or in economics terminology, there are no barriers to entry for men because they have nothing to lose.
See a cute girl on the street? Go up and make an introduction (in the most non-creepy way you can), get her number and hang out. It’s more energy consuming but in the long run, it would be the most effective way because straight-up approaching in real life takes balls of steel that not many men have. Sure, if hook-up apps are working for you – by all means continue sticking to your strategy. I’m speaking to the men out there who are sending out loads of messages all day with zero success whatsoever to speak for, yet continue to delude themselves that they are “saving time.”
TL;DR: Tinder is no longer the magic bullet to climbing the natural selection pyramid. Smart Bros have to think out of the box and innovate to stay ahead of the game. Don’t use technology as a clutch; get the hell out and talk to women.