Bubba Watson Warms Up At Oakmont With A Trick Shot He’ll Never Be Able To Do Again

The summer’s a pretty hard time of year for me. And not just because I’m afraid to take my shirt off in public ever since getting nicknamed ‘Fatty Pack’ at a middle-school pool party. It’s because I suck at golf. If I can successfully get the ball off the tee and out of the tee-box in one swing, I call it quits for the day, because it’s all going to go downhill from there. In the winter, it’s easy to pretend. I just leave my clubs in the corner of my garage and always pretend I just remembered that I have to clean them so people know I have them. In the summer, things get more complicated. I either have to come up with reasonable excuse why I can’t make it to a golf outing (“Oh man, I’d love to, but my dog’s probably going to die this afternoon. I really can’t miss that”) or, if I have to go, I have to come up with an excuse why I’m playing so horribly (“Man, I’m having a rough day today. I wish my dad hadn’t walked out on us before he taught me how to golf”).

So, when I see guys like Bubba Watson just casually chip the ball straight into their hands and then shoot it like a basketball into the hole from 10 feet away, I get a little hot under the collar. Partly because I’m bitter I can’t do it and partly because, even though I’m mad, I’m still impressed by it.

Thanks, Bubba. That’s really the confidence boost I needed. You should have just ended the video “Also, fuck TJ.” That’s how good that made me feel. Thanks for making me watch you use your clubs as an extension of your arm while, for me, they’re as cumbersome as a second dick growing out of my kneecap.

Watching Bubba fuck around, however, makes it easy to forget the difficulty these golfers should expect to face at the Masters this year at Oakmont. For one, Oakmont has a history of being a difficult course to play, but this year it seems to have upped the ante a tad, with both ball-swallowing roughs and fast greens. Sure, Bubba is a professional golfer and was just messing around, but I doubt a chip from that position was going to end up where he wanted it to AKA in the hole. Maybe, just maybe, the PGA should allow trick shots like these on certain holes. It would allow the golfers to play better and give them an excuse for when they don’t play as well. Because, trust me, nothing helps people’s perception of your golf game better than excuses, professional or otherwise.