Shaq Literally Had No Idea What All-Star Pascal Siakam’s First Name Was And NBA Twitter Was Aghast

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Pascal Siakam is arguably the most unheralded All-Star / NBA champion in recent memory. A prototypical lunch pale guy, dude just shows up to the stadium, drops 20 on 45 percent shooting and then disappears like a fart in the wind. Hell, there hasn’t even been a leaked visual of his penis on Snapchat, which is becoming a rite of passage for many young stars.

The NBA’s 2019 Most Improved Player seems like he’d be a favorite amongst the NBA on TNT crew for his work-first mentality, but that does not seem to be the case. At least with, what’s his face, Shack.

Is there another player in recent NBA history averaging 20+ ppg who an average fan who hadn’t just woken up from a six-year coma couldn’t name? Hell, I’m just three letters away from spelling *checks Google* Antetokoumpo correctly.

Keep in mind, we’re just a few weeks removed from both Kevin Durant and LeBron James criticizing Shaq for their consistent hating on younger stars (ie Shaq telling Donovan Mitchell to his face he doesn’t have what it takes to get to the next level).

The internet, for all its perpetual bickering, banded together to fight Pascal’s fight.

This is why the NBA is the pettiest league in professional sports and this is why I will never stop watching.

Matt Keohan Avatar
Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.