This Couple Getting Married In Whole Foods Is So Millennial I Almost Choked On My Açai Bowl

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If you were to talk to 2017 me, I would tell you that Whole Foods is only good for stealing your money and scoping attractive women in yoga pants. But, post-Amazon acquisition, I heard the prices dropped without affecting the yoga pant supply. I gave it a shot and now I may get the Whole Foods label tattooed on my forehead. I’m a believer. It’s clean and efficient and their produce doesn’t look like a squirrel took a dump on it, which is a novelty in New York. I now understand the hype behind people shopping there, but cannot get to the place where I’m okay with people getting married in a grocery store, no matter how transcendent the offerings.

But, it’s 2018 and I should not be surprised by a couple getting hitched in a Whole Foods. That is exactly what North Carolina couple Ross Aronson and bride Jaqueline Troutmant did.

According to Today Food, the couple built their relationship strolling up and down the aisles of Whole Foods when they lived in New York City. In February 2017, Ross dropped down on a knee in the flower aisle of a Chapel Hill Whole Foods. Jaqueline said yes for some reason.

https://twitter.com/noaht_k/status/967486492892385282

What started as a joke, the couple decided to tie the knot in the very place they got engaged on the one year anniversary. They brought on Whitney Harlos from Whole Foods’ marketing department for the wedding on Feb. 24 and crafted hand-made signs throughout the story with more than 77 food/relationship puns. These puns included phrases like “dairy-tale wedding,” “cantaloupe anymore,” “rib-eye do,” and “joined in holy mackerel-mony.”

After the ceremony, the couple and their guests gathered in the Whole Foods cafe area for the reception.

Congrats to the happy couple, I guess.

[h/t Today Food]

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Matt’s love of writing was born during a sixth grade assembly when it was announced that his essay titled “Why Drugs Are Bad” had taken first prize in D.A.R.E.’s grade-wide contest. The anti-drug people gave him a $50 savings bond for his brave contribution to crime-fighting, and upon the bond’s maturity 10 years later, he used it to buy his very first bag of marijuana.