Antonio Brown has had plenty of free time on his hands since he was released by the Patriots in September after multiple women accused him of sexual misconduct, and when he hasn’t been throwing a temper tantrum in court, going to random high schools to shoot hype videos, and working on his burgeoning rap career, he’s devoted a solid chunk of his time to making ill-advised decisions on social media.
The wide receiver has made headlines on an almost daily basis over the past few months thanks to his online activity, and while you’d think someone in his camp would have pulled a Jay-Z and snatched his phone out of his hand by now, it appears they’re all afraid they’d pull back a bloody stump if they tried.
Thanks to his associates’ inability to prevent Brown from making poor decisions, he kicked off an impressively bizarre saga last week when he proclaimed in a tweet that his New Year’s resolution involved no more white women in 2020, which was apparently inspired by his rocking relationship with Chelsie Kyriss, his former girlfriend and supposed “baby mama” who he claims is trying to extort him for $25,000.
On Tuesday, Brown continued the saga when he announced in an Instagram post that he’s planning on dropping an album titled “No More White Woman” next year.
He also put out a casting call for white women concerning a potential photoshoot.
Plenty of outlets—including BroBIble—have been covering this ongoing drama operating under the assumption that Brown is swearing off white women all together (which has predictably caused plenty of people around the internet to label him racist).
However, he’s consistently used the word “woman” instead of “women,” which raises a very important question: Does Antonio Brown actually know the difference between the two or is he simply swearing off a single white woman when 2020 rolls around?
While I wouldn’t label myself an investigative reporter by any means, I wanted to get to the bottom of this issue, so let’s take a look at the evidence at hand to try to figure it out.
To kick things off, we have to go all the way back to Brown’s younger years in Florida, where he attended Miami Norland Senior High School. While there’s no telling how much that institution has changed since he attended it in the mid-2000s, here’s how the school measures up academically according to one source:
“[Norland] has 1,743 students in grades 9-12 with a student-teacher ratio of 19 to 1. According to state test scores, 21% of students are at least proficient in math and 26% in reading.”
While I don’t have a way to access Brown’s transcript, I’m going to take a leap of faith here and say his grades weren’t exactly stellar when you consider he wasn’t able to play football at Florida State due to academic reasons, so I’m going to go ahead and assume he falls into the “not proficient” category.
After spending a year at prep school, Brown managed to land a scholarship at Florida International University, which is actually a pretty solid academic institution. However, based on a graph I stumbled across, it’s possible to get accepted with a low GPA and below-average SAT score—especially when you possess the athletic talent Brown did.
However, Brown’s time at FIU was cut short after he got into a confrontation with school security and he would eventually find himself at Central Michigan, which currently states students must have a minimum GPA of 2.7 to apply. However, it’s unclear if they make exceptions for athletes, and even if they don’t, there’s no telling if Brown’s grades in English classes helped or hurt him.
Brown declared for the NFL Draft following his junior season, but after he was cut by New England, he decided to go back to school and provide us with what may be the best piece of evidence we have.
As you can see, Brown signed up to take classes in technical writing, management, religion (with a focus on death and dying), and sociology (this one focusing on racism and inequality of all things).
However, it’s that English class that’s the focus here, as Brown hopped online in September in an attempt to help find someone willing to edit a paper with the following tweet.
While the sentence is only 16 words, Brown manages to make a couple of elementary grammatical errors over the course of it by using “do” instead of “due” and “prof” as opposed to “proof.”
Wait!” you may say. “How about the apology he issued to Robert Kraft that was devoid of any glaring errors?”
Look, I’m not going to stop you from thinking Brown actually penned that himself, but as someone who writes for a living and still isn’t sure when to properly use a semicolon, I refuse to believe the wide receiver was the person who typed that out.
So where does this leave us? Well, you can A) Think that Antonio Brown is on a vendetta against a particular white woman and is aware of the concept of a singular noun or B) Antonio Brown is done with white women entirely but lacks the grammatical prowess to accurately convey that declaration.
I’ll let you come to your own conclusion, but after examining all of the evidence at hand, I fall firmly in that second camp.
In fairness to Brown, he has used “women” correctly on a few occasions based on a cursory search of his Twitter history.
However, he’s also used it incorrectly stretching all the way back to 2015.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have to go brace myself for everyone who’s not going to be shy about letting me know if I made some errors of my own in this article.