Wall Street Is A Roller Coaster Right Now, So Let’s Remember Bert The Broker

I’m sure at some point in the past week, someone has frantically told you to not look at your 401k.

Don’t look at your 401k.

Don’t look at your 401k.

Don’t look at your 401k.

But let’s be honest – it’s impossible to not scratch that itch when stock market is in a tailspin after a 10+ year bull run, with murmurs of a long and unsettling recession on the horizon.

Because what else is there to do?

Everything is cancelled

So should you sell that 1 share of Tesla? 

Having all that financial information at your fingertips on your phone just makes it worse – in a bear market, checking Robinhood or Acorns is practically an act of self-masochism only trounced by checking Reddit’s Wall Street Bets, where you can measure your losses and sense of self-worth with the herd.

And if you look online, there’s a plethora of blind-leading-the-blind advice and STONKS memes to numb the blow.

It’s the proverbial watching a car crash and not being able to look away. Except it’s all your hard-earned assets tanking, along with your hopes and dreams of a quiet retirement life someday in Delray Beach.

In turbulent financial times and global coronavirus hysteria, there’s one man who guide us with his zen-like wisdom of the financial markets.

Bert The Broker.

A Lebowski-esque Dude who has been our Wall Street spirit animal here at BroBible going back to our beginning years.

It’s a good time to revisit him.

10 years and one month later, Bert’s words of assurance about the markets are just as relevant as ever.

And we could all use Bert’s levity during this time of self-quarantine, social distancing, and no sports.

Buy low, sell high. That’s the mantra.


While we have you, check out Bert The Broker: Summer Share 

And Bert The Broker: Lacrosse Camp Coach

Can’t believe we posted the original Bert The Broker video in February 2010, but here we are. Happy to be here.

Thanks for reading BroBible.

We don’t have jack shit to do either, so we might as well blog through our apocalyptic boredom.

We’ll see ya around.

Brandon Wenerd avatar
BroBible's publisher and a founding partner, circa 2009. Brandon is based in Los Angeles, where he oversees BroBible's partnership team and other business development activities. He still loves to write and create content, including subjects related to internet culture, food, live music, Phish, the Grateful Dead, Philly sports, and adventures of all kinds. Email: brandon@brobible.com