It is with tears in my eyes that I must announce that the celebrity rendition of Imagine from March has not solved all the world’s problems.
Good try, good effort, Ramen noodle hair.
Thankfully, we have Alyssa Milano, who appears to be posturing for a role as Grandstanding Gal On A Wine Drunk in the next Scorsese film.
She has already proven herself to be the most diverse actress in Hollywood, if this tweet is any indication.
please, I am begging one of alyssa milano's friends to confiscate her mobile devices pic.twitter.com/10RwA0S6HC
— امنه خان ☪️|🏳️🌈|⚧|acab|blm (@jaythenerdkid) July 31, 2020
Milano put her acting range on full display Thursday night to her 3.7 million Twitter followers, kicking off a 22-tweet digital ambush no one can remember asking for.
I’ve got a lot of words tonight. Care if I vent?
— Alyssa Milano (@Alyssa_Milano) July 30, 2020
Do we have a choice? No we do not.
The 47-year-old actress covers everything from the evils of Trump to MLB baseball to sympathizing with Boomers to policing to more Trump hate to the Washington R*dsk*ns to Cheez-Its to Breonna Taylor to babies in cages.
To Milano’s credit, these issues aren’t trivial and they need addressing, but Americans just don’t have the bandwidth to hear it from another pandering celebrity, one with seemingly dubious intentions.
Oh there it is. That’s what you want.
Milano’s shot at Rogan could be in response to a May 2019 podcast in which he mocked her for advocating for a “sex strike” to protest strict abortion laws.
Milano has every right to blast Rogan, this is the internet after all! She’s just gotta get her facts straight.
Her political podcast, appropriately named Sorry, Not Sorry, does not come close to even one-third of the viewers Rogan has. According to RT, Rogan’s show has 9.1 million subscribers and a 4.5 rating based on around 163,000 reviews on Apple Podcasts, while Milano’s has a 3.5 rating based on about 2,700 reviews. It ranks in the 5.700 range in podcast rankings, via Chartable.
Alyssa Milano being mad her podcast isn't as popular as Joe Rogan's is funny because they both live in the same gated community, wow here's my sitcom
— Molly Lambert 🦔 (@mollylambert) July 31, 2020
Also….I think you're giving yourself a little too much credit with that whole "triple" thing. pic.twitter.com/ksapGiqFsF
— The Morning Drive Podcast (@DriveWithDavid) July 31, 2020
Let's all just take a moment to consider that she is sitting in this house tweeting her judgements on us and this entitled bullshit. pic.twitter.com/L8EhPhb1w0
— DEAL (I am that Follow Back Boy) (@RobertVoices) July 31, 2020
If you hear a toddler screaming. Don't worry, it's just Alyssa Milano.
— I A N 👽 Иан (@JUICYxFRUIT) July 31, 2020
As much as I love to shit on Joe Rogan….. Let's not try to pretend that some crime of being committed because Alyssa Milano can't get people to listen to her shitty podcast. https://t.co/6B3obSBppu
— Lil Turinabol Metabolite (@DanielBHervey) July 30, 2020
If Alyssa Milano wants to grow her podcast she should go on Rogan
— Katie Herzog (@kittypurrzog) July 30, 2020
Rogan is a bro-fest for boys who like to grab each other’s asses and slam beers for three hours.
— Brian Beckcom (@BrianBeckcom) July 30, 2020
…and what’s wrong with that, Brian? You homophobe.